A couple of years ago I found a writing contest I wanted to enter. As I begin to pray through and organize my thoughts I decided to use my mom's letters as the foundation for my article. She died after my first semester of college so I only have 3 months of notes and letters but they are full of wisdom and love. I went to the filing cabinet where I kept them, took out the envelope which held them all, and was devastated to discover it held other things. I searched everywhere, but with no luck. You can imagine my heartache as I cried over the loss of her last words to me. One letter in particular included words of wisdom that I cherished. I had her words memorized but seeing them in her handwriting made them a tad more powerful.
Last night I was going through some old things...tossing out what wasn't needed. I came across some cards from dear friends, a thank you letter from a special friend for her 30th birthday party, pictures from college, and a picture with a note from my mom that I kept on my wall during college. Another find was one of mom's letters! And not just one of them...it was the very one that I wanted most dearly! Tears just flowed down my cheeks when I recognized her handwriting on the envelope...my heart stopped in my chest and when I took out the letter and realized it held the dearest words of wisdom. Let's just say, I nearly fell apart!
I read that letter aloud and was so moved by the timeliness of her words for today! It might be 25 years later, but her words are fitting for me now because her wisdom was based on the word of God. His words never change and they are always the answer I need. He is always faithful to me...giving me the very things I desire without even asking for them.
I am loved by the King and it makes my heart want to sing!
I am a girl who grew up with a daddy that told her she was beautiful everyday...he still greets me with a "Hi, beautiful!" (Now, he says that to his wife, my sister, and my daughter, but that's not important right now!) He told me if I ever heard someone whistle to turn and wave because they were whistling at me! I always heard people say I looked just like my mom and I thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world.
I am a girl who always dreamed of being a mom...just like mine! Playing games, riding bikes, going on picnics, playing cards and reading together. I learned to bake cookies just like she did, gave my best effort at learning to sew (didn't take), and took to heart the importance of solid, strong friendships (II Timothy 2:22).
I am a girl who deeply desires to be on the heels of my Savior. I cherish the few years as a teenager when I was blessed to attend First Southern Del City because that is where the passion for journaling my relationship with Christ began. I knew that if God could and would speak personally through His word to the other girls in my small group than He would talk with me.
I am a girl with faith larger than a mustard seed. I believe! I trust! I take people at their word and expect them to follow through. With God I never have, nor will I ever, be disappointed. With people, I have had my heart broken more times than it can bear. And yet, my faith continually puts me in the place of trusting and expecting.
I am a girl that was blessed to become a mom! Many girls do not get to receive the joy and blessing of motherhood and I count it a huge honor to have Jackson, Cameron and Chloe entrusted to my care! I love playing with them, teaching them (Proverbs 22:6), challenging them, and loving them! Watching them grow and mature is humbling as they are surpassing me in so many ways!
I am a girl that has made mistakes. I can pinpoint several times in my life where I ignored the escapes God provided from temptations and yet He saved me from myself. I remember a time when I fully recognized the escape He was offering me and I ignored it completely. (I Corinthians 10:13) I am ever so humbly blessed that He is a forgiving God who overflows with love for me!
I am a girl who is not defined by her past...even her recent one. I am a daughter of the most high King! I am loved and sought after! I am valued and forgiven! (I John 1:9) I am the girl I committed to be on April 24, 1974, when I asked Jesus to be my Savior. I am the girl I confessed to the world in September 1976, when I shouted by example through baptism that I am not ashamed of the Gospel of Jesus (Romans 1:16)!
I am a girl who is resting in the peace lovingly provided through the Holy Spirit as I make decisions to be the best me I can be. (John 14:27) I am a girl who will thrive through the fulfillment of the desires God placed in the depths of my soul. (Proverbs 13:19) He knows me...He created me...He longs for me to be fulfilled and complete.